If she really does exhibit strong and persistent BPD traits, she likely has the emotional development of a four year old. She therefore must rely on the primitive ego defenses that are available to a young child. These include, e.g., temper tantrums, projection, denial, black-white thinking, and magical thinking.
"Just salmon? That's pretty weird." Why the hell did I say this?
I think she only is upset as to how it makes her look in front of the other bridesmaids. Now all the bridesmaids know enough to never let their significant others or spouses within spitting distance of her. The groomsmen will all snicker about how access to her coochie only requires a 2 drink minimum.
Dont persue anything with this girl. continue to be there for her as a friend and thats it.
There is nothing you can do to stop her whether she cheats there or not. All you can do is be the confident secure guy and wait for her to come back. You say you trust her so prove it to yourself and her. It is much easier said then done though. The other side is just flat out say you will not tolerate this and will end it and then stick to it.
and on bed, for those of us that can spell ;)
What is this thing, Sex, that you speak of?
I know this can be a foreign concept to many, but it can happen.
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